Perhaps I am confused, but this is what I think a family should do.
Check up on each other. If you know someone is having a difficult time, show up at their house and see if they need anything. You may not be able to do anything more than wash a dish or lend an ear, but sometimes that’s all that’s needed.
Cut each other some slack. As a family you are bound to each other by blood for eternity. You will all make bad choices. Things will happen that you don’t agree with. Who cares, you’re family.
Fix each other a meal. If you live within five miles of each other and haven’t seen each other in a month, give someone an invite and feed them. Free food will always get family in the door.
Hold the guilt trips in. If for some reason you feel the need to send someone on a guilt trip by all means, reign that puppy in and bite your tongue!
We have found the mute button. As a family we don’t often consider that at some point in your siblings life they found the mute button that keeps them from listening to you blather on. When you’re speaking and someone gets the distant glazed over look in their eyes…shut up.
The only thing that matters is love. Here is something that I learned from Nanny. It doesn’t matter what happens or how much someone hurts you, you have to forgive. My ex and his cousins are the best examples I have of this and you guys don’t know them to understand. These are the guys that refer to themselves as outlaws. They are crazy. They drink too much. They know how to party. They know all about getting in trouble. They are the rowdy bunch at the honky-tonk your momma warned you about. They loved their nanny, and she loved them. It didn’t matter what insanity they got themselves wrapped up in she always had a bed for them to sleep it off, a cup of coffee to get them motivated, and a few kind words (and a switch or two.)
That being said… in some cases family is the people you choose to make commitments to out of love and respect.