Home? Sure! Pick a Starbucks…any Starbucks.

Lately I have been writing to you from a comfy bench seated at my local Starbucks.

I should work here I have been here so much.

Honestly though, life has a way of just not working the way I plan it to, and I am now in a holding pattern. I am living more of a creative existence, but even creatives need a paycheck. That will happen. I have faith that it will happen. It has to because that’s just the way things have to work, even if that means temping for peanuts.

Hey! Did you know that Starbucks has a bar scene?

Really?!

You didn’t know? Well, neither did I until lately.

Maybe it is just my neighborhood Starbucks that does because a high seated stool is just where many guys like to sit around here.

Right now I am staring at three guys who look like they are regulars. I say regulars like you would bar regulars. The kind that every bartender recognizes and calls by name. These guys are calling each barista by their given name and perusing the public looking for bait.

They check out each girl and drink their luscious blend of bold or blonde.

Heck – even the coffee is sounding sexy!

These guys are not.

Did I mention that?

They seem more like the three guys at a sports bar discussing (with intensity) their most recent conquest. (Not that I can hear what they are saying.)

Two look dressed for work at one of the local refineries and the other is in basketball shorts and hi-top converse shoes.

Guys – if you are wearing Cons…keep the pants on…unless of course you are on your way to work out or just left the gym.

This guy didn’t look like he’d been in one in a while…I keep my original statement…wear jeans.

With this I would like to tell you a bit about my holding pattern.

Many parts of life that have been left up in the air are sorting out.

Custody situation – Done. Mark it off my list for 2012.

Divorce situation – Done. Mark it off my list.

Place to live? – Have one…but not where you would think…at least not where I planned. Once again my mission to move home blew up in my face. I am still stinging from the embers.

It’s funny really how this continues to happen…but I keep trying to do it.

Einstein said, “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”

So does this make me insane? Constantly trying to move back home. I have moved…a lot…I have moved across the country even and NEVER have I encountered the level of hardship that moving back home presents. Seriously.

Two years ago I quit my job and moved into the unknown. I started out headed to Connecticut, ended up in upstate New York and everything worked….it could have worked better but either way it worked. It was an amazing adventure.

Right now…all I am trying to do is move three hours west and NADA.

I feel like I should just stop. Network, work, freelance for hire, and make day trips for meetings, but apparently I am supposed to be here for a reason unbeknownst to me.

When God presents me with his resolution I will be sure to share it with you.

So, until I figure out what this next step is that I am taking I will be coming to you live from my local Starbucks, possibly becoming a regular and perusing the local clientage.

Okay – maybe not.

I leave you today with a music assignment. Listen, hear the words, and think of home. Where is home for you? Is it a place or a thing or maybe even a person?

I will think on this. I think I am trying to replace a person because I was home when I was with my husband…now that is insanity…until tomorrow…

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6 thoughts on “Home? Sure! Pick a Starbucks…any Starbucks.

  1. Lisa Wields Words says:

    As so many people have said to me recently, give it time. You just overhauled your whole life. Things will slowly come back together. At the same time, I really think that home is inside yourself, once you learn to accept that. When we put too many expectations on moving to a perception of home (as I did earlier this year) we set ourselves up for disappointment, until we can recognize that home truly lies within.

    • Megan D. says:

      I am going to say that I am not a crybaby for my eyes welling up with tears at reading your comment. That I think is it. I have just not gotten to where I am at home within myself, without another person and keep trying to fill that void with something that I have out grown. God puts us where we need to be to grow to our potential…even if geographically it isn’t necessarily the place we would choose. Thank you Lisa. I think giving it time is great advice…it’s not in my time. I just need to keep reminding myself of that…message on the bathroom mirror maybe.

      • Lisa Wields Words says:

        You are NOT a crybaby, says the woman who has shed so many tears over the past few years she could fill an ocean. Hugs. I have a feeling we are both about to embark on incredible journeys that will have ups and downs but will be fulfilling and lovely as we find our path to ourselves.

  2. That one girl says:

    I agree with Lisa. Bricks, mortar, plywood, sheet rock – those comprise buildings that we call houses. We live and dwell in them but the feeling of ‘home’ comes from within and you can take it anywhere. Being ‘home’ is just having a feeling of comfort, security, and love. When you find those things within yourself it won’t matter where you lie your head at night… you’ll be home.

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