What do you do when you are faced with a problem?
Do you tuck tail and hide? (Because that’s what I feel like doing.)
Do you ignore the chatter and rise from the ashes? (Hope to do)
Eat pumpkin anything and gain 20 pounds? (As I type I am eating delicious pumpkin bread pudding…and it’s amazing!)
Here is the problem – and it’s not really a problem – just something else on the path to understanding. I am losing my job. I have been here since April 2012, and I have worked my tail off letting everything including this blog suffer and for what? To be told that since your boss was a bad boss we had to let him go and since we have a whole team assembled who can do your job in another city we are going to let them do it.
Sure, they have offered to move me to one of two locations – without an increase in pay – one is in the middle of desert surrounded by the pollution that I loathe and the other is deep in hickville away from proper civilization. I don’t require much, but for a girl who loves theater, symphony music, and museums…hickville’s not going to cut it.
So I am here…arriving at decision time with three months to decide my fate.
I guess it’s really not three months, more like two and a half, but it is also right at the holiday season when NO ONE wants to hire!
It would be perfect if I could leave here at the end of the year, take a week off, and start right up somewhere else, but to get them to even look at my resume. No actually it would be perfect if “they” could find a way to keep me for at least a few more years, or if they could pay me more, or if I didn’t have to be on the road 3 hours a day just commuting to and from work.
I figure that’s just part of life living in one of the most spread out cities in the country.
I get excited at the idea of leaving…but where would I go? What will I do? Where will I live?
Do I move to get out of a city full of smog?
Do I find something that keeps the rest of my life as it is and just humbly soldier on?
Honestly, I do have responsibilities here.
I lead a Cub Scout den. I will start leading Danielle Laporte’s Desire Map book club for the “South of Houston” area in January (I would have to give that up – and I don’t wanna.) I am a member of a church that I have grown to love and get excited to attend every week.
I would love to work locally though, heck – I’d love to work from home! Wouldn’t that be awesome! I could do a lot if I worked from home. I would save money and not be on the road so much. I don’t think it will happen, but it is fun to dream.
I feel stuck. I shouldn’t because I have time, experience, and options on my side.
I feel let down because something I thought would last is ending.
I feel nervous because of timing and possibilities. Fortunately some of those possibilities are out of my control and with a little prayer and meditation the nervousness can be tempered.
I also feel excited by those possibilities. What could happen if I just step out of this shell that I’ve encased myself in? What if I find exactly what I am looking for in a job and career?
What if something amazing happens because now I get to look for it out in the open without recourse by my employer because they told me to see what’s out there?
Now time to reread my post from last week…I think that line of thinking is key to my next step.
Until next time –
Just found on Raw for Beauty’s facebook page, by way of the Desire Map group. It’s long but so beautiful and appropriate for this post.