Flirting is a Lost Art

I think the inability of recent generations to wait until the right moment is a disservice to oursleves. Flirting really doesn’t exist anymore. Say you see someone. You decide you want to meet this particular someone. You walk over and just start chatting. There’s no build up, there’s no considering them. You aren’t even trying to catch their eye to see if they are interested. I think it’s generally an antiseptic approach with base information.

Getting asked on a date by someone my own age generally goes like this…

“Hi, I’m Ted.”

“Hi Ted. I’m Meg.”

“Want to get a drink?”

“Sure”

“Why not Sky Bar tonight at 9.”

“Okay.”

“Okay, see you then.”

That is not a fun conversation! That is not playful! That’s nerves. That’s irritation. That’s like instant messaging…just spoken. It lacks anything that makes a girl even want to try.

I want to be flirted with. I think most people want to be flirted with. Make each other know you are seriously interested in them, then strike up a conversation for a minute. Women want to be wooed. Get to know something about us and let us learn something about you.

I know this is going to sound like the utmost in cheese…but I must say share.

I remember being 15 sitting at Chelsea’s Pub at Lakeline Mall in Austin, and turning bright red when my friend’s mom tried to teach us how to flirt. As we waited for our salads and fried cheese sticks my sister and my friend started giggling. My friend’s mom asked us what was going on and I told her that the other two had spotted a cute guy a few tables away.

She took that as an opportunity to critic our skills.

We had none.

She was apparently an expert in flirting…an old school expert. She sat in the middle of that restaurant smiling, winking, and waving. Capturing a guy’s attention…not a real guy mind you. She already had a man’s attention. Her husband’s and he wasn’t there!

She looked at the three of us and said…you have to learn to flirt.

My tom boy attitude was to throw my head back and laugh…like flirting would work! Bahahaha!

My sister giggled.

Our friend burst out laughing and then screamed, “Mom NOOOOO!”

She just gave us a knowing smile. She said you need to catch their glance. See if they notice. Give them a little smile and go back to whatever it is you’re doing. Look up again and see if you get eye contact…and so on and so forth until one of you waves.

Gotta give a guy an invitation in her scenario. Most these days guys don’t care if you have given them an invitation or not. You can glare at them at they think you are pretending you’re a kid punching the person you like because you want their attention. Truthfully I don’t think that punching someone is a sign of endearment outside of elementary school.

Old school flirting. Huh? Maybe she was right.

This is just not how it is done anymore…should it be done this way?

YES. Oh my goodness yes.

(Yet another window into my little life.)

I had never done the old school flirt tactics I learned on that spring day 16 years ago until yesterday. By no means did I even remember what my friends mom told us until he was walking away and I was left with the giggles.

Now, I am laughing at myself…because really…ugh!

I caught a guy staring at me through the window at Starbucks. I wondered if my hair was standing on end, anything obvious that would make someone stand there and stare, smiling like a goofy school boy.

Um…not that I could tell and I wasn’t going to scuttle off to check. A girl likes a little attention sometimes.

So, I continued to write my post on buying local. You may have noticed that it is dramatically shorter than anything else that I have written lately and that is because of this guy.

Let’s call him McSteamy. Why McSteamy? He looks like the character from Grey’s Anatomy. He is freaking hot.

I was so distracted I couldn’t concentrate on what I was trying to write…and I don’t even know his name.

As I settled in and began my post I had all kinds of wonderful things I wanted to say about freshness and cost effectiveness and taxes, and then I felt eyes boring into the side of my skull. I look up and this lovely man just smiles. Big, broad, goofy smile like I know him and he knows me and all my secrets.

I turn red, look back at my computer screen and try to not giggle.

As I sighed, I thanked God he was standing outside.

He just stands there peering through the window watching me try to type. And I do mean try…I kept writing a word here and there, but really this was impossible to do with someone I didn’t know staring at me. I gave up. I texted my friend Sim and she laughed at me. She knows I am more than a little self-conscious and while I am confident, I am still shaky on my looks.

Sim told me to give myself a little credit. So again I sigh, regroup and to type again.

Feeling eyes I look up, I smile this time…ever so subtly and go back to what I am doing.

Every time I look up from my “work” I see him just looking in watching me. This wildly handsome dude is checking me (in my gym clothes and tennis shoes) out. I had crazy hair…it was windy, but I really didn’t care (to that point.)

He came in and got another coffee. I looked the other way and continued to type. I opened Facebook and looked for a distraction…nothing. Facebook really isn’t as exciting as it was when I was working and there was nothing else to do. I think I can feel him staring at my back while he is getting his coffee and going back out to the crowd of men playing chess.

I didn’t look back. That would have been way too silly, even for me. He had a great voice though…deep and manly. I smile to myself and for the first time in nearly an hour I can get more written on my post.

In a not so subtle act of insanity…because what else could it be…he finally sits down to play chess with an old man. He sits so that when he’s not looking at his chess pieces he’s looking at me.

Ugh! What am I going to do!? I consider for a second packing up and going to my neighborhood Starbucks and trying again…but I couldn’t do that. I need a day like this every few hundred. A little confidence booster, you know?

He’s playing chess…concentrating on his move, talking the old man, drinking coffee and looking very nice and kind.

Yep, I’m the one staring now. He’s tall, over 6 foot and broad-shouldered. He looks strong and well-built. Looked so relaxed in a navy pull over, jeans, and loafers. (I’m a sucker for a guy NOT wearing athletic shoes.)
Strong jaw line with the “just enough” facial hair thing…like McSteamy, only dark…and his eyes are sort of piercing, brilliant blue.

After another few hours of the staring, smiling, googly eyes I finally got my post done. He finished his game of chess. He said bye to his friends and walked away. He looking over again just as I was looking up and waved…the silly finger wave. Gets in his truck and as slow as possible drives away staring at me.

I laughed…out loud. I got stares from everyone sitting near me.

I thought my lessons on flirting all those years ago.

Flirting is a lost art…but with men of a certain age…it’s alive and well.

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Make someone smile

So, I started this dramatic post about three days ago about love, recovery, and how we are each recovering from something in life. Well, I am in a good mood and rather than rehash those feelings this morning I thought I would try to help you laugh…just a little.

Humor is after all the best medicine and today it is a little dreary out. (At least in my location.)

This morning at 3:05 AM I HAD to go pee. It was nature, I couldn’t help it, if I hadn’t gotten out of bed right then there would be a mess. So, I got out of my squeaky old bed as quietly as possible. (See above – I am not a little girl…so at 3 AM it can be difficult.)

I did my business and stepped lightly back to bed.

I lean ever so slightly over the crib to put Michael’s blanket back over him…what do my ears hear?

“Mommy!!!!”

“Ugh…Mikey it’s time for sleepies. Please try to rest.”

(I pray to the Lord above…God, I am tired. I worked on the little gifts for Elijah’s party until the weee hours in the morning. I MUST sleep. 7 AM is going to come all too soon. PLEEEEASE!)

“Mommy.”

“Mommy.”

“Mommy?” This time it’s Elijah.

Lord! Why?! He’s supposed to sleep!

“Elijah…why are you up?”

“Michael woke me up.”

“Hmmm…it’s 3 am. Please try to go back to sleep.”

We go on like this for another 45 minutes. Trying to conjole them back to a peaceful slumber…then just trying to get them to sleep…then just leaving them in the room…nope. They found me. They said they were hungry.

I was hungry too.

None of us had felt well at dinner time yesterday, so we didn’t eat much.

I look in the fridge. I look in the pantry. What I would really like is a bacon, egg, and cheese buscuit from Whataburger. It just sounded yummy and filling and like something I would love right then AND the boys agreed.

So, at 3:45 am this morning I was headed to Whataburger…for you country folks that might be a trek of gigantic proportions, but for us it is less than a mile from our front door. We could easily walk if we chose…we drove. It was afterall wet and rainy and there is a chill in the air.

We turned out onto the neighborhood street and then down the back road to the main street. I spied headlights behind us…WHO ON EARTH IS OUT AT 3:45 AM?! What are they thinking!? Surely they should be in bed! Then I remembered…I was out. Heading to Whataburger at 3:45 am. :/

The boys were singing along to the radio and I was jammin to some soothing guitar rifts as we arrived at our destination and the headlights behind us zoomed off. Apparently the local PD was making sure we weren’t out doing something naughty at 3:45 AM.

(Just so you know friends the streets are safe at 3:45 am)

Maybe not 3:45 pm, but I think that’s another story.

So, we ordered our meals and each got some ice cold milk. I paid and we drove off. Ready and hungry for our BEC buscuits. Yummmmm….I could eat one now as I type this.

We arrive back home, no police tail this time.

I unload the boys and myself and grab our bag of goodies and we head inside. As we sit down at the table I dig out the meals for each of us and we nibble our hashbrown fingers.

As I unwrap each sandwich, what do I spy? Sausage. 😦 It was unfortunate. I removed my sausage and ate just the egg and cheese. I’m not a fan of the processed meats. I can see that the bacon is normal.

Anyway…we eat what we can and then they are willing to sleep. Finally at 4:30 AM.

No more Mommy’s, no more noise…I sit down on the couch, curled up a throw blanket and laid my head down…for just a minute…I woke to the sitter letting herself in at 7:30 this morning.

Morning routine was nearly complete by 8:10 when I tried to give Elijah some cough medicine/mucinex. My little drama boy who normally takes THIS kind of medicine without a problem was literally kicking and screaming. Apparently trying to help him with his cough and phlem was a massive attempt at murder.

I am sure that is what the neighbors thought.

Eventually he swallowed enough after the THIRD teaspoon was flung across the living room. One teaspoon in, that was all that needed to happen. No dice. Grr…

10 minutes later, wearing a different shirt Kathy was walking out the front door with the boys. Took Elijah to school while I planned my day. Which really consisted of me sitting scrolling through my new phone.

Yep, I’ve been a bit of a slacker this week.

I did finally leave the house and went to Home Depot. More Saving, More Doing…right?

Well, I made people smile this morning.

As I walked around the store in my ballet flats and capri’s looking at the big construction stuff, loading up my cart with the necessities I need to complete my move.

HERE is part of the list of items I purchased and why I made the cashier laugh…

2 rolls of Packing Tape

8 Medium Boxes

2 pack of Deadbolt/Door Knobs for self installation

The lady at the check out counter looked at what I was buying and asked, “Moving out?”

It wasn’t until I was half way across the parking lot that I understood why she laughed when I smiled and said “Yep!”

Have a great day!

Sisters…

I just watched a movie made for women. It was gorgeous, well set and beautifully made. It has forced me to think about the bonds we form in our lives the ones that last a lifetime.

My oldest relationships are with my sisters and friends.

The blessings I receive through their very existence is amazing.

“Snow Flower and the Secret Fan” is about these relationships. The movie revolves around two story lines intertwined, made into one seamless heart wrenching tale. I won’t tell you much about it because I think you should all watch this film.

It’s mostly foreign with subtitles. By the end it is all subtitles, and I think that’s part of the beauty.

Intermittently while watching I have been talking to my oldest friend that I have in this very small world. She and I met when we were 11 years old shortly after I moved to a little town in the hill country. We road the same school bus, were in the same class, and through the years we have always remained close. We talk about anything and everything. We have shared sorrows and joys with each other that we don’t share with everyone else. She understood my “Anne of Green Gables” obsession between ages 12 and 14 and I understood her Anne Rice obsession a few years later.

We know all each other’s secrets and still – we like each other. We love each other. There are few people I would do as much for, some would say she is my kindred spirit.

I must admit that we have challenged the relationship and lost touch for a while over the years, but eventually one of us reaches out, we catch up.

We always catch up.

Nothing was ever so horrible that it made either of us say we hated one another…not from the time we met through not (at least not that I am aware.)

She’s watched as my mind goes from one thought to the next and then on again and back and forth and back again.

Who is it that dictated a soul mate had to be of the opposite sex? Who is it that determined they had to be a sexual partner? Why couldn’t it simply be the one person who through our life has remained ever present?

The Greek tale of humans being split in two and left to find their other half, did it say that the other half was explicitly the opposite sex?

Once we discussed soul mates in our girls group and two of our friends said that they considered one another their soul mate and I thought it was a bit odd. How could they be the others soul mate? What is it about a soul mate that I just didn’t get?

I thought it was the husband and wife partnership. But now i think it doesn’t have to be.

The movie brought up the concept of a Laotong.

The short version of a laotong is the non-blood sister that you are matched with from a young age. You depend on each other for emotional and moral support and through out your lifetimes you help each other.

In the movie, the women were eventually married, but the man was not the soul mate, the laotong was the soul mate and the man was simply a business/procreation matter. (Please remember it’s Chinese.)

I think it is possible to have multiple people you are this close to these days, but nothing is so sacred as your oldest friend.

I know that men are often driven off the deep end with the sister relationships in our lives. They know that some how they will never have the same amount of intimacy or understanding. But why?

I think it comes down to the fact that they are us and we are them. We have seen each other in every condition you can imagine. Also, we have our own scars, so when something unexpected happens and all they want to do is cry – we let them. We hold their shoulders and leave them alone until they are done. Then we find a way to make them happy.

Depending on which sister I ask questions, see if there is anything I can do to help, or I simply wait. I put on a funny movie, grab the Edy’s and we sit there sharing ice cream until we are both in laughing fits. My little sister and I do that one. Though I must admit she is usually the one patching me up and sending me on my way. She is an amazement to me.

I seek comfort in the familiarity of my little sister’s home. She has lived there for a nearly a decade, while I have moved so much that I know that I will be more sad than she is when she finally moves. We talk and chatter and cook and bake all at her kitchen counter. We have listened to all of the tiny feet we have given birth to learn to walk across her floor. We’ve painted the rooms every shade of white and every spring rip out the same banana trees, those things just won’t die! I will even miss her ghost. Yes, we are pretty sure she has one.

Our sisters keep us sane. Our sister keep us whole. My sister’s they keep me safe and wrapped in the feeling of love.

The love of men may come and go, but nothing is the same as the love of sisters.

Perhaps they really are our soul mates…

Boredom, it needs to end

Twenty minutes until lunch and I decide it’s time to write something. Figures!

I haven’t even been able to concentrate this week work has been so slow. So let me tell you a little about what I have been doing as I putter through the days at my nondescript occupation.

I start out the day much like anyone else. I wake up 20 minutes late, race through the morning routine…clothes? Last pair of clean slacks. Clean shirt, doesn’t really match, but no one will see them anyway. Throw clothes on the kids, brush teeth all around, and race out the door only to arrive at work 15 minutes late. It has pretty much been like this for two weeks now. Every night I resolve to wake up on time and get out the door on time, but SOMETHING always comes up.

Monday – I stood beating on the sitters door for 15 minutes.

Tuesday – Missed my exit…I was trying to go fast and ended up passing it right by…utter stupidity.

Wednesday (Today) – I actually only got here 5 minutes late and that was because the sitter was telling me all about her plans for next weeks photos with Santa and I wasn’t looking at the clock. (I’m a moron sometimes.)

Anyway, once at work I fill up my monstrous coffee mug add the yummy bits to make it drinkable and walk around the corner to my office. I sit down, exchange some pleasantries with my boss and stare at the black computer screen. I sigh as I click it on and wait for it to boot up.

More like wake up…I only lock it at night.

Like most of the working public I open email first and wait for it to load. I seek to provide whatever information is requested as soon as I am able. Alas…for most of the 7 months I have been at this position, there is nothing pressing. Today I had a Holiday greetings from the Pres., Two commencement notifications, and a payroll thing that I am always copied into even though it has nothing to do with me.

So…I sigh again. Already my ass hurts as I know it will be another day of nothingness.

So, I open the internet. The killer of time. The manipulator of masses. I open my personal email. Delete everything just about everything that is new. Open my Daily Thought from Real Simple magazine.

Today’s quote:

“Constant effort and frequent mistakes are the stepping stones of genius.”

Elbert Hubbard

I ponder the inexactitudes of life’s many mistakes. I think about how I got to the point of sitting in this chair for 11 hours a day four a week. Oh – the mistakes MUST be making me a genius about deciding what I really DON’T want out of life.

I read a story from Fast Company about how you shouldn’t dwell in nostalgia and should let the past stay in the past. Here is the link.

http://www.fastcompany.com/1800662/comedian-actor-patton-oswalt?partner=homepage_newsletter

I again am contemplating the life choices made and that I sometimes do think about the past too much and remind myself that I shouldn’t. I chose the road of the rebel…now to make something of the life left to live. I have lived. I have had a lot of fun. I regret little and can’t stand that I think I was happy when I was dotting every I and crossing every T of what SOMEONE ELSE thought I should do.

Then I open Facebook. I click “LIKE” a lot. I comment on some status’. I realize that I said something idiotic but too late to delete that thought…so moving right along. I look at funny pictures. I post a status about how bored I am and I check out my two groups, one is the We Blog group and the other is my girls at Girls Talk. We grew up together (sort of) but we all have similar tastes and senses of humor and find that talking about things with each other makes life easier for all. My support group of sorts. I tend to post more than the rest, but that’s because I post all the things I would like to post on my page, on our group wall, because some things my grandmother just won’t find funny, and I have received a reprimand by “The Grown-Ups” for something I have posted on FB before, so it’s just easier for me.

That brings me to a friend who was talking about the books she was reading so I Googled Tucker Max. Let’s just say that I have some friends a lot like Tucker and I saw his movie “I Hope They Serve Beer In HELL.” I remember laughing a lot, and this is the book my friend is reading. So, I browse the page and start reading about his “Roadtrip to Austin.” If you haven’t read anything of Tucker’s I will warn you…bad words, sexual content, extreme situations, jail, drinking in excess, it’s all there…but it is so funny you keep reading. Here is the link to the roadtrip story.

http://www.tuckermax.com/stories/the-austin-road-trip/

This is my morning. I am living in a virtual world while the actual world is out there screaming at me to come join it, but a girls got to make a paycheck some how.

Oh – I have an interview Friday…so HOPEFULLY I will be living a less virtual life very soon.

Home…

I think I may be longing for a little nostalgia again.

This rock girl has been listening to country music for the last two days, and it’s caught up with me.

I can’t get that feeling of wanting to curl up in front of a fire with a cup of hot chocolate out of my head. Longing to feel the comfort of the familiar. Longing to put on comfy jeans and a warm sweater. Perch myself at the top of Lookout Point and stare out over the hill country, feel the cold breeze against my cheek and breathe deep the scents of home.

 There is a peace about my hometown (which is actually a grouping of several towns). There is a nostalgia there unlike any other. Just walk through the Courthouse square or sit by the little river in Burnet’s city park its quiet voice echos through time.

Last Friday I went to the Walk of Lights in Marble Falls and strolled along the lake. The brilliant lights dazzled me as a kid, to see all the different scenes and then to sit on Santa’s lap and tell him what I wanted for Christmas made me the happiest girl around. Remembering the years we did that as children, my heart swelled on Friday watching my child’s eyes light up as he mischievously took off running toward the brilliant lights. I would have run too…but I had a stroller to push over a rock path and grass.

My five year old got to see something that I loved so much as a child and we shared hot chocolate with our friends and family that had joined us on our walk. He got to tell Santa what he wanted for Christmas….I wish I had been able to hear…and then all the kids got on Santa’s lap for a photo. It was lovely! Michael and Aaralynn screaming as Elijah smiled for the photographer and Shelby grudgingly stood in the shot with her little sister. One of those moments that will last a lifetime.

My best, oldest friend in the whole world, who is the only person I have known since childhood besides my sisters was with us, and suggested we go to eat. I said sure, let’s go to McDonald’s the kids can play while we eat. (I really despise McDonald’s overly processed food and ageless burgers, but the kids need to play!) So, it was off to Burnet we drove. As we wound our way through the dark hills along highway 281 I couldn’t help but feel completely at home.

As we neared town I couldn’t allow my friend or myself to eat that terrible McD’s food, so I called her and made her turn around and meet me at a local place called the Maxican. If you are ever in the TX hill country you should stop, it’s wonderful!

As it happens in small towns, you run into people when you visit the busiest restaurant in town.

I have barely spent any time back home since high school, but I still knew the owner of the restaurant, several of the patrons, and the hostess (who happens to be a friend of mine’s grandmother and in some way is related to the owner but I can’t remember). You don’t get that in a city. You don’t get the sense of community. You don’t get the feeling of belonging.

It’s like that scene in “Sweet Home Alabama” when Reese Whiterspoon’s character says, “My life in New York works, Jake. But then I come down here… and this fits too.” Insert Houston for New York and that’s how I feel.

Anyway, I long for the nostalgia of home today. I long to feel like I belong, like I am home, like I did on Friday as I met friends I hadn’t seen in years.

Home…

For the Daters…I know you’re out there…

I’ve been exploring lately on my followers blogs and it seems a few of you guys are dating. While I am not quite there, I’ve been out a couple of times lately; so I thought I would share MY thoughts with you on how alllll this is supposed to work.

To add a little perspective, I thought I would share some things from a book a friend gave me as a gift called, What is He Thinking? by Rebecca St. James.

Who is Rebecca St. James? (According to the back of the book…)

Australian-born Rebecca St. James is a Grammy Award winning musician with record sales in the millions. She is also an in-demand speaker, bestselling author and actress. You can read more about Rebecca on her official website: www.rsj.com or on her Facebook page: www.facebook.com/RSJames

Now I better not get in trouble for copyright infringements or anything.

(Please Lord? Thank you!)

Anyway…back to the topic…dating.

Can I say right now that I don’t like it?

This whole trying on people and see how they fit routine. I am naturally picky and won’t even go out with someone unless I am really interested. There is too much work and expense involved…even if I am not the one paying for whatever we are doing. I still have to coordinate a sitter, depending on who I can find is upwards of $40 for one evening.

As I have stated in several posts….I am a poor girl! 

Even if I can get a family member to watch then there is the whole explanation of where I’m going, who’s going with me, when will I be back.

It’s exhausting!

I don’t know many people who willingly stand in front of the shooting gallery and try to dodge the bullets! Single moms and dads who want to have a few hours with another adult do it regularly.

Before we even get to that point we have to find SOMEONE to go out with! How do you do that?! Where do you do that?! Who is supposed to do the asking?! All questions for the ages…and maybe we can answer them (at least a little) here.

How? I don’t know, so I am going to refer to Rebecca’s book…for starters you make a good first impression. Be yourself. Don’t try to be someone you are not. If you are trying to be someone else eventually your true self will be revealed and then…”You got some espainen to do, Lucy!” (Sorry, you have to say that with the Ricky Ricardo accent.)

But what if you already know this person? Well…you must be doing something to get them interested in you to begin with…so just don’t change and get all nervous and self-conscience on them. It might turn them off. As an over-analytical-seemingly-crazy person I know! Try to not do that. It will not end well.

Where? I don’t know where.

That I leave to you to figure out. I guess it could be anywhere.

I know someone who met their first husband when he hit their car in a traffic accident. Another who met her husband when she was 15 after trying to set the guy up with her best friend.

We aren’t 15 anymore and I HOPE I don’t meet whomever I go out with in a traffic accident…no accidents PLEASE I can’t afford a new car.

If and when I decide its time to go about doing this I will have to figure the where out. At the moment everyone I see on a daily/weekly basis is happily married or at least committed enough in their relationships to see it through. I have PLENTY of examples of how to make it work…just in case I ever need them.

So who is supposed to ask for these dates? Hmmmm…this is a toughy. It really depends on the people you are asking out. Are they a “man’s man?” They don’t want to seemingly be emasculated even though that’s not what you are meaning to do. Are they beyond shy and don’t have the…uh…juevos…to do it themselves? Have you guys been friends so long than suddenly decide you want more out of what’s going on?!

Here is my theory…JUST ASK! (This is not the theory or advice given in Rebecca’s book.) However my thought is that if you have a strong enough personality and identity to ask a guy out and they can’t handle that then they aren’t the guy for you. If you are a guy who wants to ask the girl out ASK! The whole thing takes a matter of seconds, and either you will go out or you won’t.

In the end it really doesn’t matter who asks.

Guys – if you feel like less of a man because a woman approaches you, that’s your problem. Maybe you should reevaluate whatever it is that makes you feel that way

Girls – if you like a dude and really want to see where it will go ask. All they can say is no.

Everyone – Please – for the love of ALL that is holy – GIVE A DIRECT RESPONSE! If you get a text invitation, say yes or say no, but don’t leave them hanging. That is rude and uncalled for. If the person doing the asking is grown up enough to ask you to do something, then they are grown up enough to hear a no.

Wow – this is getting long…I think this is enough for today. Check back tomorrow as I continue with a part 2!

**Part 2 will include much more of the book than this does.

Phenomenal Female Fridays #1 – Linda!

Starting today and continuing every Friday we are going to highlight some of the amazing women I know who have helped create my unique view of the world.

All the women who are going to be participating were given the same questions. Listed below.

1) Please share your first name, age, and occupation (if you have one). 
2) Are you where you had dreamed when you were a child? Are you where you planned as a teenager? 
3) Do you think that you are wiser for the things you have been through that got you here? 
4) What do you dream for your future?
5) If there was one thing you could change about pop cultures’ philosophy of things what would it be?
6) Do you allow what is popular to influence you? Explain either way.
7) Who inspires you?
8 ) Do you think you inspire others? (If you got this then you do. :))
9) What do you think the secret to happiness is?
10) Please share one life altering thought, concept, or event.
 
Each person is allowed to edit, omit, or respond how they wish, that way you guys don’t get bored with simple Q&A sessions.
 
This first person is my mother, Linda.
 
She is an artist.
 
She is a creative with a magnetic energy that attracts people to her like coffee to Starbucks. We do love our Starbucks.
 
She and I have been through a lot (mostly my doing,) but we are coming back to that place where the daughter realizes that the mother was so right about so many things.
 
Will the life of a mother and daughter each with a strong personality and view of the world ever be perfect? Probably not, but the older I get the more we get along and I love that. I am going to continue to try my hardest.
 

Linda! (AKA My Mom)

53 years, 34 jobs, 33 cars, 6 kids and 3 husbands later…All I am REALLY sure of, is that I KNOW I do not know all the answers but the journey toward the knowledge is always good.
 
There is no simpler or better way to answer it all. Love you Mom!
 

Getting to know you

There is a learning curve when you are out meeting new people, or even old friends. Just as you are getting to know them or getting reaquainted with them you start to make assumptions about who they are without directly asking the questions. This morning I woke up singing the song “Getting to know you” from the King and I.

Why?

Because my history is full. I won’t say it’s checkered, but certainly eventful. Several of my friends are pushing me to write books about it all because if told properly is sounds more like a comedy in unfortunate dilemna’s.

I don’t think anyone would understand it without a book. It may also require a timeline and bubble notes.

How did you meet this person? How does that person fit? When were you in Europe? The bailbonds man seriously didn’t ask you for ID anymore? Why didn’t you leave him? When did you live with that person? You’re seeing who now? You ran away? From what?! Now you’re planning on doing what?!?!

“You’re insane, but I love you!”

It reads like an epic adventure. I want it to read like an epic adventure. I don’t want to have to say I didn’t try everything. I crave adventure. I crave life.

I don’t care if people think I am wild or crazy or surround myself with questionable people (on occassion.) These are the things that create memories. These are the people that make you want to have bigger and better experiences.

I am able to say that I have lived. I have loved. I have spoken the truth regardless of the circumstances. If I love you you know it. If I like you I tell you. If I want to know something I will ask.

If anyone ever wants to know anything about anything I have been through or done all they need to do is simply ask. This is my blanket permission slip.

In the past I wasn’t always open about events or the things that were happening. I was lost, ashamed, even afraid of the things that were going on, but no more.

I will no longer feel smaller than my spirit for choosing to live in the moment.

Our choices do not define us. We are a sum of so much more than our choices. In essence our choices don’t matter. We must take the initiative to live out loud. We must be able to fail and try again.

There are many people that I would like to get to know better, currently only one that I would like to get reaquainted with completely. What encourages them? What do they dream? How did they do all of these amazing things? What brought out their voice and created their presence?

This just about sums it up for me…

If you want to know something about the people in your life ask them questions directly, if they lie to you, leave them.

If they are able to tell you the truth and you can handle it keep them forever.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow

It was a Monday that few things good happened, and everything that could have gone wrong did. I know it’s now Tuesday, but after reflection I think you could all use this reminder.

God is in Control.

God’s hand is leading you even when you can’t feel Him. He is aligning your path so that only good things come your way.

“Praise God from whom all blessings flow.”

Mondays suck for the majority of the working class. We have had two days off to play and pray and then you have to go back to work for “the man.” They are not the favored day for all of us on the Monday through Friday 8 to 5 schedule…well I work varied hours, but you get it right? Not our favorite day.

Throw in the fact that yesterday I lost my computer, my car broke down, and I had to borrow money from my mom to get it fixed, yesterday was the absolute worst!

It is only after reflection that I am able to remember that even on days, like my day yesterday, God has got my back.

Looking over the state of things life is good. I may not have everything I want, but I have everything that I need. I have a job. I have a loving family. I have two of the best children ever created. I have amazing friends who are there for me. Love and laughter and I can survive another day.

This is just my little reminder that no matter how bad it is, as long as you are doing all you can to make it work, then you are on the right path. No one ever said this life would be easy.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow, no matter your circumstance.

First day of school

My son would have you believe that today was the best, most perfect day EVER!

Why?

He started kindergarten today.

He has been so excited since registration that every morning he woke up in anticipation of that day being the first day of school. He got uniforms, a lunch box and a shiny new backpack.

Last week he was so funny, packing his backpack and lunch box with toys and juice boxes, just HOPING that it was finally time for school.

We saved our school supply shopping for this past weekend. Saturday I woke up at 6 am with every intention of getting out before the masses, but the boys slept. Even though I did laundry, washed dishes, and banged around in the kitchen making breakfast, they continued to sleep.

It was 1 pm by the time we left the apartment. It was 105 degrees outside and the crowds were less than cordial. We were nearly run over in the first 10 minutes!

Wal-Mart, the mecca of discount drudgery, was packed. The school supply section of our chosen Wally world was standing room only. Available supplies were dwindling and tempers were flaring! We were hard pressed to find all our supplies, but we put the word out to our fellow late shoppers that we were in need of a few items and if the saw them – let us know!

At 2:30, we were finally able to leave Wal-Mart. Elijah was begging, “Mommy PLEASE! Let’s GO HOME! There are too many people!”

Michael, “WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

By the time we left I felt like crying, but we weren’t done for the day.

My sister called with the location of the back packs and school boxes of the right size. I cringed as I thought of the amount of stuff that was still needed on the supply list, but I had hopes that everything would be at the Wal-Mart in the next little town over.

So – we went home…to recover for a minute to let Mike catch a few winks and to have a snack and an hour and half later we were driving to the next Wal-Mart. We found all the remaining items on our list and celebrated the end of the day with dinner at Cici’s. (The restaurant for starving, cash poor families everywhere.) 😉

Anyway – let’s get back to school. 

This morning Elijah woke up before I could get him up. Bounding out of bed with, “Is today school?!”

“Yes, Elijah…today is school.”

“YAAAAAY!” So jumping up and down he gets dressed, packs a lunch, and can’t sit down.

              First day of Kindergarten!

As a mom this is where I sigh…and pray. I am praying that he keeps this vibrancy about school. I pray that for the next 20 years (I am planning on him being a doctor :)) that he stays excited. That I can find exciting and interesting ways to keep him going back every year and getting that excited in the belly feeling every year!

If he can get excited about learning and stay excited than we win. Score! So, for the next 20 years my job is to find a way to make even the drudgery of the mundane as exciting as blasting rockets.

Good luck to me and to the rest of the parents out there! We are gonna need it!